"I know my eyes already like you, baby you. I know that love is, love is found." ~ Sade
Surreal and so real. That's how life feels at this very moment. Hazy days fade into blurry nights and back again. Yet I am in it. I am a mother of two in our now family of four. T and I were talking about how good it feels to be here. To have our family complete. We believe we are done. Now I'm not saying this will never change, but I'm pretty sure that two kids fulfill us. It's a beautiful feeling.
It's the next season for our family. And it's only the beginning. The first episode of the season, if you will. Z is just over a week old. T went back to work. Q is in preschool twice a week. And I am home trying to juggle my new motherhood. And I only have two wee ones to juggle, but it still seems daunting. I won't deny that I'm scared. That I wonder if I'll be able to handle this reality with grace. How do people do this every day?! But for now, I am managing.
Z's newborn scents have invaded the house -- fresh baby skin and sour milk spit-up intermingle with sandy shoes from the park and Q's favorite fruit snacks meld with Elroy's not-so-pretty kitty mishaps. They seem to go well together. It's far from perfect, but it works. This new aroma at Guido.
More than ever, I am grateful for our family and friends who are so generous with their time, with their donations of food, and with their love for us. We are beyond lucky. Every visit, every text, every Facebook post, every email means so much to me as I face this new frontier. It truly makes the transition from mama of one to mama of two that much easier, and I'm pretty sure T feels the same way on the daddy front. Life with a newborn can be so isolating, so I'm trying to hold on to this outpouring of love and remember that it takes a community to lift up this family of four.