"It's a fast lane world that we're living in, Sometimes love takes a little test bend" ~ Lee Roy Parnell
These moments. The ones right here in front of me. I need to cling to them in heart and spirit. I need to stop whining about myself and remember to be thankful. Thank you to these wise mamas who reminded me of this very notion.
Dear Baby -- A Lesson in Learning to Be Present
The Mommyhood Memos -- I Want Life to Revolve Around Me
Aura Joon -- Hello, and Goodbye (wasting time)
I read these posts over the last few days and each has made an impact on me, combining to give me the gift of happiness in the present. Of remembering that Q will only be this age at this one time. That his sense of wonder is so precious. That we have so little time left as a family of 3 and that I want to go into the transition of our family of 4 with a sense of calm and an ability to just be.
Both T and I have been bogged down by the stresses of life lately. Sometimes life just seems too hard. He has been making many career and work-related adjustments and his energy has been pretty low when he is home with family. And then I am of course emotional and tired from working, parenting Q, and baking this baby girl. We had a talk the other night about how we need to focus more on the positive. I have one last week of work and then I'll have a bit more time for QT with Q (including attempts at potty-training) and some last minute prepping for LL. And hopefully I'll get one more date with my husband before she arrives. But as time seemingly slips away from us, I want us to revel in each moment. I don't want to be that "woe is me" mama. So I am aiming to enjoy even the little parts. We ended up having a great weekend together as a family, hitting a couple of different parks, going out to breakfast during which Q actually ate happily at the table, going to two different parties where he was well-behaved and we had fun with friends.
In the moments that don't seem so fun, I want to be able to rely on my sense of humor. Without ever saying it in so many words, I believe that's the best parenting advice my mom ever gave me. She was able to laugh in most situations. She could be kind of cynical and quite sarcastic, but it was always with the undertone of good humor. She told me I was her optimist because I liked to "make a fun time of it." Sometimes I don't know what happened to that part of me. Where did the optimism go? I want it back. And this weekend showed me that I can be that person again.
Every parent with older children tells us to enjoy this time. That it goes so fast. And I'm starting to understand what they mean. There's something special about being needed so desperately for guidance, for help with understanding the world, and for some simple affection.
|Rockin' is serious biz.|