As I wrote about recently, this time in my life and my friends' lives has given me reason to pause and reflect a bit. Getting older is clearly different for everyone. Some view the aging process with trepidation and fear of what they will become. Others tread lightly as the years go by, hoping for contentment but not seeing far beyond the present, while others still are more ambitious about starting their own families and becoming a "grown-up." I know there's more to this spectrum, and I think that's what's important to note-- there is a spectrum of ways in which each person develops and matures.
Which brings me to my venting point. I believe there is a difference between simply succumbing to "getting old" and maturing. Just because I don't go out every night does not mean that I'm old and boring (or at least that's what I like to tell myself). I am able to find pleasure in a relaxing night at home more often than I did before, and that partly has to do with having more financial responsibilities that don't allow me to constantly shell out cash for $9 drinks at the bar and partly is just liking to hang out with my man in our cozy, little home. I definitely have routine in my life, which is comforting at times. Other times, I enjoy breaking up the week with a trip to a new grocery store- kidding! I really do think of myself as being pretty youthful and fun-loving for the most part. But staying home on a Friday night doesn't make me feel quite as loser-ish as it once did. I don't need to be sloshed every weekend to maintain my youthfulness.
Not that I'm the Queen of Maturity, riding up here on my high horse into the Kingdom of the All-Knowing or anything. It's freakin' surreal to get older, to feel the future pushing down your door and to still maintain a level of coolness. I do wish I could be a little more spontaneous sometimes. I could probably watch a little less TV. But damn, sometimes I'm tired and what sounds best to me is hunkering down with my cashmere throw, some red wine and my Netflix movie. If that makes me old and boring, so be it. Or better yet, if loving that is wrong, I don't want to be right!
Which reminds me-- I've been wanting to try this new bar in Oakland...